Canadabis by E. Reid Ross

Author:E. Reid Ross
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Adams Media

FIVE

CHRONIC QUOTES

Marijuana has inundated our culture. Everyone has an opinion about it these days and they all want to be heard. The best way to get a solid feel for how a society stands on the issue of marijuana isn’t by reviewing the current laws on the books, but rather by asking the citizens themselves. So here is what people are saying about weed.

246 COMEDY PROPS

Canada rocks. Primo weed. Really good Chinese food.

—Allison Janney as Ms. Greenstein, Weeds

247 THE FAILED EXPERIMENT

The legalization of marijuana is not a dangerous experiment—prohibition is the experiment, and it has failed dramatically, with millions of victims all around the world.

—Sebastian Marincolo, author of High: Insights on Marijuana

248 AT LEAST HE DIDN’T SAY “ON FLEEK”

We’re in Canada and the hydroponic stuff up here is just thorough!

—Edward Norton, actor

249 MCCONAUGHEY’S EASIEST ROLE EVER

Wooderson: Say man, you got a joint?

Mitch: Uhhh, no. Not on me, man.

Wooderson: It’d be a lot cooler if you did.

—Matthew McConaughey as Wooderson and Wiley Wiggins as Mitch, Dazed and Confused

250 SO IT GOES

Alcohol and marijuana, if used in moderation, plus loud, usually low-class music, make stress and boredom infinitely more bearable.

—Kurt Vonnegut, author

251 THE NEW KING OF MORNING COMEDY

Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered other similarities between the two, but can’t remember what they are.

—Matt Lauer, TV show host

252 ALSO, LESS BURPING

I don’t consider weed to be any worse than having a beer.

—James Franco, actor

253 CALL IT MEGADOPE

I’d get up in the morning, wake and bake, watch MTV, sing along with the Buggles, play some guitar, take a nap, and get on with the day. No harm, no foul.

—Dave Mustaine, musician

254 THE POT PLATOON

I went to Vietnam, and I was there for a long time. [Using marijuana] made the difference between staying human or, as Michael Douglas said, becoming a beast. I’m telling you, it’s rough and a lot of people in that platoon used it, not on the front line but in the back, to stay in touch with themselves. So, I look at that time in my life as really much of a lifesaver.

—Oliver Stone, film director

255 THE WORLD’S CLASSIEST POTHEAD

A girl and a guy were smoking joints, and they had them in their hands like this [demonstrates holding a joint], and I said boy, those are sloppy joints. . . . Of course I know how to roll a joint.

—Martha Stewart, businesswoman and TV personality

256 WHATEVER YOU SAY, GOD

Never give up the ganja.

—Morgan Freeman, actor

257 JAGGED LITTLE LEAF

If ever I need some clarity . . . or a quantum leap in terms of writing something, [weed’s] a quick way for me to get to it.

—Alanis Morissette, musician

258 BETTER ALL AROUND

Smoking’s a way to let you down slowly from a ballgame. It also makes you use less of the resources around. It makes people better in the way they act towards society. Everybody’s nicer. It’s hard to be mean when you’re stoned.

—Bill Lee, American baseball player

259 THE HUNGER GAMES

They said that marijuana was a performance-enhancing drug.

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